From the time we’re born, society conditions us all to strive for goals. Trained by our parents and teachers to set expectations, we learn from an early age how to develop processes to achieve what we want: a new toy, a better grade, and a new friend. Both as children and as adults, we identify objects that we think will bring us joy, meaning, and fulfillment—and then we aim to get them. The problem is that most people are aiming for the entirely wrong things. In fact, when I meet …